Burn for Burn Read online

“Ren,” I say, and then I can barely swallow, knowing what’s going to happen to her tonight. I tell myself Rennie will be a better person after this is over. It’ll be like how things went with Alex. We’ll all come out better on the other side.

  The doorbell rings. Nadia screams for me to come downstairs. Rennie and I grab our shoes and our clutch purses and go see what’s up. Nadia’s taking a white box from the hands of a delivery man while Mom signs his clipboard.

  “Hmm,” Mom says, and then turns and gives a secret smile to Ms. Holtz. “What could that be?”

  Ms. Holtz smiles back, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

  I open the card in the tiny white envelope. For my two girls—have fun tonight. Love, Daddy.

  Nadia tears open the box. I swear she’s an animal when it comes to presents. “Daddy sent us corsages!” Nadia screams, sliding hers onto her wrist. It’s a purple orchid, and it goes perfectly with her dress.

  Rennie looks over my shoulder as I take mine out of the box and put it onto my wrist. Mine is a pale pink orchid. “That’s so pretty, Lil,” she says in a small voice. I can tell she’s jealous.

  When I turn around, I see Nadia opening up my clutch. I lunge at her and scream, “Don’t go into my bag!”

  Nadia’s mouth drops open. I literally rip it out of her hands and say, “I said, NO LIPSTICK!” My hands are shaking.

  Nadia recoils. “Sorr-ee.”

  Rennie gives me a funny look. “Ease up, Lil.”

  My mom takes a picture of Nadia and me with our corsages on, and e-mails them to my dad. Then Nadia’s date comes to take her to her friend’s house. He brings her a corsage too, so now she’s wearing a corsage on each wrist. Of course Mom makes them pose on the stairs together. Nadia threads her arm through her date’s and smiles. In her heels they are the same height.

  After they leave, Ms. Holtz and my mom drive us over to Ashlin’s in my mom’s car. The limo we rented is already there, parked out front.

  PJ, Reeve, and Alex are standing together awkwardly, passing around PJ’s water bottle with vodka inside. They all have suits on. I think Reeve’s is the same one he wore to junior formal. I can tell because it’s charcoal gray, and because the jacket is tight across his shoulders. PJ has on these weird plastic sunglasses he swears are cool, despite the fact that he bought them for $5.99 at Beachcombers. Alex is the only one who actually looks comfortable in his suit. It’s nice, a black jacket, his tie is gray, and his shoes are freshly shined. Alex goes to a lot of dress-up functions with his family. I know that because his mom’s always trying to invite my mom along.

  Reeve’s mom is pinning Rennie’s corsage on. It’s a hot pink rose with baby’s breath. Rennie freaked out when Reeve gave it to her. She jumped up and gave him a kiss on the cheek. It’s not like he went to the florist shop and was, like, This rose will match my date’s shoes, or whatever. I’m sure his mom picked it out.

  Ashlin looks beautiful in her dress. It’s short with an empire waist and a swingy skirt of rows of cream-colored silk, and it makes her look really tan. Her hair is twisted and pinned up, a few pieces in tiny braids, and her heels are strappy pale gold.

  She’s going to make a great homecoming queen. I just hope Reeve doesn’t totally ruin the moment for her. Kat said a couple big drops of the E would do the trick, but maybe I’ll just do one. I don’t want him to throw up on her or something.

  Ashlin’s mom directs us to the front steps of the house. As we line up, I find myself next to Reeve. He looks at me for a quick second and then walks away and stands on the opposite side of the group, slinging his arm over Rennie. Everyone else shifts over to make room for them.

  We take a few pictures like that. Then Rennie calls out, “Couples!”

  I walk off the stairs, and she and Reeve cuddle together, his arms around her waist. She throws her head back, laughing at something he whispered into her ear.

  Mrs. Lind jumps out with her camera and says, “Lillia! Go stand next to Alex.”

  I turn, and Alex blushes. “We’re not going together, Mom,” he says.

  Mrs. Lind lifts her camera up to her face. “I know, but the two of you look so cute together. Don’t they, Grace?”

  My mom nods approvingly. “Send me a copy of that one, Celeste.”

  “Of course,” she says, gesturing for us to stand next to each other.

  Alex comes up next to me, and we smile for the camera.

  “A little closer,” Mrs. Lind urges. “Put your arm around her, Alex.”

  Alex sighs and puts his arm around me, saying, “Come on, Mom. We have to leave soon.” He put on cologne. He doesn’t usually wear cologne. It smells nice, though, like lavender and woods.

  Mrs. Lind starts snapping away. My smile feels like it’s cracking. I wish we were already at the dance, so my part was done.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

  KAT

  I’M STANDING OFF TO THE SIDE, NEAR WHERE THE TABLES and chairs are set up, watching as Lillia ladles punch into two cups over by the drink station. She reaches into her black clutch, touches up her lipstick, and oh so casually tips the vial into one of the cups. It’s so smooth and fast that if I hadn’t been watching her like a hawk, I wouldn’t have seen it.

  Lillia walks back over to her table, pretending to look for Rennie, who is in the bathroom. “Where’s your girl?” she asks Reeve, who is sitting alone. “She asked me to get her some punch.”

  Reeve looks taken aback. “Rennie’s not my girl.”

  “Well, that’s not what she thinks. You really shouldn’t lead people on like that.”

  “You’re one to talk.” I can tell Reeve’s checking Lillia out by the way he keeps looking away and then quickly looking back. “Rennie’s my bro. That’s all.”

  “Alex and PJ are your bros. Do you make out with them, too?” She’s still holding on to both of the cups, her clutch tucked underneath her arm. The plan was for Lillia to just offer him the punch. I don’t know why she’s still talking to him.

  “We were playing spin the bottle!”

  “I wasn’t talking about spin the bottle. Or that night at Bow Tie. I was talking about last night.”

  “Why do you care so much?” he asks with a smirk.

  “She’s my best friend,” Lillia says automatically.

  I wish she would look over at me so I could signal to her to wrap this up already. This exchange is going on so long, I’m starting to wonder—is she going to chicken out? I hate to admit it, but maybe part of me would be relieved. Just the tiniest bit. I’ve known Reeve as long as anybody else. Everyone on Jar Island knows how bad he wants a football scholarship. How bad he wants off this island. As much as I do, even.

  I find myself holding my breath as I wait to see what Lillia will do. Across the room I see Mary come in through the doors. She looks beautiful in a long pink dress, her blond hair down in waves.

  I guess Lillia sees Mary at the same time I do, because she finally holds out the cup to Reeve and says, “Cheers. Good luck with homecoming king.”

  Reeve looks surprised, maybe even pleased. He takes the cup, taps it against hers, and then he downs it in one swallow. Smacking his lips, he says, “Good luck to you, too, Cho.”

  I turn, hoping that Mary saw that. She winks at me.

  Lillia doesn’t answer him. She just takes another sip of her drink, looking nervous.

  Now that that’s done, I head out of the gym and toward the girls bathroom to pee. I’ve already had, like, three cups of punch.

  I walk in, and there’s Rennie, standing in front of the mirror wearing this ridiculous silver sequined dress that barely covers her butt. She gazes at herself in the mirror, pursing her lips and making her eyes wide. I know that mirror face so well. I’ve seen her do it a thousand times. For, like, two seconds nostalgia washes over me, and we’re back in my room, mixing up lip glosses for the perfect red and trying to figure out how to pluck our eyebrows.

  Her eyes flicker over at me in the mirror, and the moment is over. “Oh, w
ow,” she says. “I can’t believe you came. Alone.”

  “Well, it is our senior year,” I say. That’s it, nothing more.

  She gives me a weird look before walking out. I guess because she was expecting another fight? One of my bitchy comebacks, perhaps? Don’t worry, Rennie. It’s coming. The bitch slap to end all bitch slaps.

  * * *

  I’m pouring myself more punch, because damn, it’s seriously good, when I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn around, thinking it’s Mary. But it’s not. It’s Alex, dressed up in a black suit. I have to admit, he looks hot.

  “Hey,” I say.

  Alex makes a mock surprised face. “You remember me? Alex Lind? The guy you haven’t spoken to since school started.”

  I can’t hold back a smile. “I’ve been busy.”

  He lets out a laugh. “I’m kinda surprised you’re here tonight.”

  Mockingly I say, “How could I miss homecoming? It’s the biggest night of our lives.” I say it mockingly, but I’m actually feeling real feelings. Because I’ve missed Alex. More than I want to admit. And it feels really good to be talking to him again, like old times.

  Alex smiles. “You look nice, Kat.”

  “Yeah, I know,” I say, smiling at him to soften it up. I’m wearing a tight black dress made out of stretchy material, and short black boots, plus a ton of eye makeup. When my dad saw me leaving the house, he was all, “Katherine, are you going to a biker bar?” As if there are any real biker bars on Jar Island.

  “What about me?” Alex asks. He says it jokingly, but I can tell he actually cares what I think. “How do I look?”

  “You look okay,” I tell him. When the smile on his face falters, I say, “You look good.”

  His face gets serious. “Kat, I just want you to know, no hard feelings.”

  Huh?

  He rubs the back of his neck. “I had a lot of fun with you this summer—and that night on the boat. But I get it. You weren’t into it. Probably wasn’t meant to be anyway, right?”

  “Right.” I’m dazed. The only reason I didn’t keep after Alex was because I thought he liked Nadia. My pride—I just couldn’t take it. Now that I know it wasn’t the case, that he and Nadia were never a thing, maybe something could happen with us.

  Alex heads back over to his table, where Lillia and the rest of his friends are. I feel a pang in my stomach. I tell myself it’s because I’m hungry.

  Mary comes over. She doesn’t look me in the eye; she just stares at the food.

  “Have a Dorito, Mary,” I say in a low voice. “Or a cupcake.”

  Her head snaps up. “I’m too nervous to eat.” I see her looking around the room for Reeve. “Shouldn’t he be feeling it soon?”

  I examine her, her thin wrists, the way her clavicle sticks out under her dress. It makes sense now, the fact that she never eats. This too must be Reeve’s fault. Eff him and his football scholarship. “Don’t worry,” I say, covering my mouth up with a chip so no one sees us talking. “It should be any minute now. All we have to do is sit back and watch.”

  Mary nods and tries to smile. “I’m going to miss our secret midnight meetings.”

  “Are you kidding? I keep falling asleep during first period. I can’t have that bringing down my GPA any more than it already has.” Not if I want to go to Oberlin next fall.

  “I just hope we can figure out a way to still be friends.” Mary blinks rapidly. “You guys are all I have here.”

  I hesitate. I don’t know how to answer her, because I don’t know myself. Yeah, Lillia and I are cool right now, but I’m not about to suddenly start wearing that friendship necklace tomorrow morning. But Mary’s looking at me with pleading eyes, and I don’t want to disappoint her, so I say, “Mary, don’t worry about that stuff tonight. Let’s just enjoy the show, okay? This is what you’ve been waiting for.” I have to talk a bit louder than I want, because of the clapping. I stand on my toes and look out to the dance floor. A circle is forming. I grin at Mary. “Follow me.”

  I lead her to the center of the gym, right on the periphery of the crowd that has gathered around Reeve. Everyone’s clapping and giving him the floor. He’s flushed and sweating through his shirt; he’s unbuttoned the top buttons and loosened his tie. He is dancing his ass off, bopping around like an idiot. I can’t tell if it’s the ecstasy or if it’s just Reeve being Reeve.

  Mary and I exchange a look.

  I know for sure that it’s the E when Reeve starts to break-dance. He can’t break-dance for shit. I start to laugh. I laugh even harder when I see Rennie trying to get close to him, dancing sexy, but it doesn’t work because Reeve’s moves are too wild and jerky. Once, he almost punches her in the face. Rennie grabs him by the tie and pulls him closer to her, and then he takes the tie off and wraps it around his temple. It dangles as he dances away from her and grabs Mrs. Dumfee, who teaches chemistry and is about a hundred years old. She tries to protest, but he puts her arms around his neck and jumps up and down. She actually goes along with it, the old hag. Probably the most action she’s seen in, like, thirty years.

  The DJ starts throwing props out into the crowd, feather boas and beach balls, cheesy stuff like that. Reeve runs up to the DJ table and grabs a pair of maracas and starts galloping around the dance floor like a prize pony, shaking the maracas above his head. I swear, he’s shaking them so hard, I half expect them to split and drop seeds all over the floor.

  Reeve’s friends, Alex and PJ and those guys, are doubled over, cracking up. But when I glance over at Mary, she looks upset.

  “He’s making such a fool of himself,” she says sadly.

  I’m not sure why, but I feel like something’s slipping away.

  “When is someone going to catch on? Maybe you should go get Senor Tremont.”

  But then the music cuts off and the lights come on. Coach Christy is onstage in a red dress. It’s weird to see her dressed up. She usually wears gym shorts and a visor. Into the microphone she says, “Will Jar Island’s homecoming court please come to the stage?”

  They file up onstage behind her. Rennie’s hanging on to Reeve like she can barely stand in her five-inch stripper heels. And from the way she’s smiling her cat-that-ate-the-canary smile, I know she thinks she has it in the bag. She takes the tie off Reeve’s head, puts it back around his neck, and straightens it. Of course Rennie wants the two of them to look picture perfect when they win.

  I stand up straighter. This is my moment. I’d better enjoy it.

  Coach Christy introduces everyone onstage, and then she opens up the cream-colored envelope in her hand with a flourish. “Jar Island’s homecoming king is . . . Reeve Tabatsky!”

  Everyone screams and claps and stomps their feet like this is some big surprise. Coach Christy puts the crown on his head, and he is hamming it up, dancing around and moving his hands as if he’s holding glow sticks at a rave. He hugs Coach Christy with so much force that he lifts her into the air. She disentangles herself from him, smoothing down her dress and looking somewhat freaked out. She quickly says, “And your homecoming queen is . . . Lillia Cho!”

  Oh, damn.

  I don’t want to look at Mary, not after I told her it was cool, that I’d made sure Ashlin had enough votes to win. Honestly, I didn’t even think to count Lillia’s votes. I did see a bunch in there for her, but she’d said that she wasn’t going to be a factor, so I didn’t worry about it. Damn.

  Maybe things will be okay. Rennie lost, and Reeve’s as high as a kite. This can still work.

  Onstage, Rennie’s mouth is hanging open. She’s not even mad; she’s just confused. Like, there must be some mistake. And poor Lillia is looking out into the crowd like a dazed baby deer as Coach Christy puts the tiara on her head.

  Reeve sprints over to her, grabs her, and practically throws her into the air.

  “Shit,” I say.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

  LILLIA

  IT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO BE ME. THIS ISN’T THE WAY IT was supposed to go down.<
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  Ashlin is clapping. She doesn’t look disappointed, probably because she never ever thought she’d actually win. Rennie’s standing next to her, with this empty look on her face, this sad, empty look. Nadia rushes up to the edge of the stage, and she jumps up and down cheering for me and screaming my name. I reach up and touch the tiara on my head with a shaky hand.

  Out of nowhere Reeve grabs me and lifts me into the air and spins me around like we’re ice-skaters. I shove him away from me and scream at him to put me down, but everyone is clapping and shouting so loudly, I don’t think he even hears me.

  The rest of homecoming court comes down from the stage, Rennie last, and I’m left alone up here with Reeve. I search for Kat or Mary in the crowd, to try to find out what in the world is going on right now, but then someone dims the lights and the music starts. A slow song.

  Reeve pulls me tight to him. I try to push him away, to create some space between us, but he just holds on tighter. I look up at him, and his pupils are completely dilated and he’s sweating. He says, “I voted for you.”

  I think I heard him wrong, because he doesn’t sound like himself. His voice is far away and dreamy.

  “Why are you so mean to me, Cho?”

  “I’m not,” I say.

  He reaches out and touches my hair, and I jerk my head away from his hand. “Your hair is so soft. Like, really, really soft. Shit. I don’t think I’m allowed to say that.”

  Reeve spins me around so I’m facing the crowd again, and I spot Alex watching us from down below. His jaw is set, his eyes fixed on us.

  Reeve keeps swaying me round and round in a circle, faster and faster. I finally see Mary, standing in the crowd. She’s biting her lip, her arms wrapped around herself.

  “My heart’s beating so fast,” Reeve says, breathing hard. The lightness is gone from his voice, replaced by something lower and more labored, even though he’s smiling.

  His heart is beating fast, so fast I can almost hear it. Feel it through his suit jacket.

  I draw back. Reeve’s eyes are watery and unfocused. He’s scaring me. I don’t think he even knows where he is, much less who he’s with. He’s holding me so tightly, it’s hard to breathe. I feel light-headed. I’m going to faint, for real this time.